History was made in Cortland County yesterday when the county's Democratic and Republican Committees agreed to swap mascots. Democrats took the elephant, and Republicans took the jack-ass. The animals were transferred at the county fairgrounds.
"It is symbolic of our peace and harmony over the past hundred years," said Elsie Ferro (R-Cortland). "We want voters to think of politics as entertainment."
"I voted against the swap," said Sandra Price (D-Virgil). "It's a health and sanitation issue to me. An elephant produces more--well, you know--"
Former Democratic Chairman William Wood said he supported the swap, and criticized Sandra Price, who is the new chairperson of the Democratic committee.
"Her concerns are gaseous and inflated. She has a sense of smell but she doesn't have a sense of humor."
Republican committee member Ron Rocco commented favorably.
"We got the best of the deal. Everybody knows it takes longer to clean up after an elephant than a jack-ass!"
(Quotes in this story are fictional and intended as satire. CC)
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