SOUTHERN LUNCH COUNTER SLANG

Louisiana Gumbo.

Cortland Evening Standard, Tuesday, June 16, 1896.

SOUTHERN LUNCH COUNTER SLANG.

Phrases In a Louisiana Restaurant That Are Greek to the Uninitiated.

   Lunch counter slang is Greek to the uninitiated. Like most slang, however, it is very expressive and the titles of the lunchroom have plenty of truth to recommend them and not a little poetry. One of the best railroad lunch counters in the south is at Hammond, La. This may be or it may not be because the man who runs it is a northern man. According to his account, the lunch counter lexicon of the south is quite different from that of the north.

   "When I went to Hammond," he said, "I didn't know what the men were talking about half the time. Two or three crews of railroad men would come in together and I didn't know what they wanted when they fired their orders at me. There was one thing I could understand, though, and that was the 'please sir,' with which almost every southerner would finish his request. The northern man says, 'Gimme a cup o' coffee.' The southern man says, 'Gimme a cup o' coffee, please, sir.' That is the way the ordinary traveler would ask for coffee. With the trainmen and the regulars, drummers and so on, it is different."

   Then he gave extracts from his lexicon, some of which are worth recording.

   "Short and sweet" means beans and molasses.

   "Gimme a Trilby foot" means "Pass me a fried pig's foot." The same desire is often expressed in a request for "a grunter" or "a squealer."

   "Give the sand box a kick down this way" means "Pass the sugar."

   "Drive the cow down this way" is an old and honored method of asking for the milk.

   "Slop and sinkers" means coffee and doughnuts. The doughnuts at this particular counter have been honored with the new title of ''life preservers." Another peculiarly apt expression for this article of diet is "fried holes."

   "Pass the dope," is a request for butter.

   "Hammerine," means chopped ham.

   "One boxing glove with plenty of lining," means a sandwich with a liberal allowance of ham. "One boxing glove without a shadow" is the sandwich moderately provided with ham.

   "Three slides down to west end" is an expression peculiar to New Orleans and its vicinity. Lunch counters in these places have one end for colored people only, and a request for "Three slides down to west end" is the way in which the waiter tells the cook to set out coffee and doughnuts on what he calls " the nigger end" of the counter.

   Sweet potato pie is a great favorite in the south, and the men come in asking, "Got any tate pone?" Another name for sweet potato pie is "poodle pie." Everything is custard, too, in the pie line. Ordinary custard pie is called "egg custard;" lemon pie is "lemon custard," potato pie is "potato custard," and so on.

   Cranberry pie is familiarly known as "red pie," while mince pie is variously called "mystery pie" and "jamboree pie." Pie with two crusts is known as "two story pie" and "double barreled pie." Pies with one crust are called "open faced pie," "single barreled pie" and "one story pie." "Celluloid pie" is another name for custard pie.

   Ham and eggs are called for as "Kansas City chicken and Adam and Eve."

"Adam and Eve" seems to be a favorite figure of speech for representing an egg, scrambled eggs being known as "Adam and Eve shipwrecked," while eggs on toast are called "Adam and Eve on a raft." Other names for scrambled eggs are "agitated eggs," "storm tossed" and "eggs around the curve." Fried eggs unturned are called "eggs with eyes open," "sunny side up," "straight up" and "two white wings turned down." Soft boiled eggs are described as "a light on the ocean wave," while a hard boiled egg is called "a light under the waves." Fried eggs turned over are called "in the dark" or ''with a black eye,"

   "Short and white" means sausage and beans.

   "One sole without a shoe" means a beefsteak.

   "Java in the dark" means black coffee.

   "Hong Kong on crutches" is tea without milk.

   Cake is variously demanded as "white cake" and "black cake," while ice cream is easily recognized in a demand for "cold food."—New York Sun.

Charles W. Fairbanks.

FAIRBANK'S SPEECH.

Protective Tariff and Sound Money vs. Free Trade and Free Silver.

   ST. Louis, June 10.—In taking the chair upon his election as temporary chairman of the Republican National convention Charles W. Fairbanks of Indianapolis said:

   "Gentlemen of convention, I am profoundly grateful for this expression of your generous confidence. As citizens we were never called upon to discharge a more important duty than that which rests upon us: the nomination of a president and vice-president of the United States. This duty is a peculiarly impressive one at the moment, for it is already written in the book of fate that the choice of this convention will be the next president and vice-president of the great republic.

   "Three years of Democratic administration have been three years of panic, of wasted energy, of anxiety and loss to the American people, without a parallel in our history. To-day the people turn to the Republican party hopefully, confidently, and it is for us to meet their expectations: it is for us to give those candidates upon whom their hearts have been centered, and to give them clear, straightforward, emphatic expression of our political faith. The Republican party is a party of convictions; and it has written its convictions in the history of the Republic with the pen and sword; with it the supreme question has always been not what is merely "politic,' but is everlastingly "right." The great men we have given to the nation and to history, the mighty dead and the illustrious living, are our inspiration and tower of strength. It we are but true to their exalted example we cannot fail."

   The speaker then referred to the resumption of specie payments under a Republican administration, to the development of the currency, to the enactment of honest tariff laws and the consequent growth of the country in wealth. He showed how this was stopped and how a reaction began when in 1892 it was known that the legislative and executive branches of the government were to be Democratic. The Democratic party had also at Chicago condemned the protective tariff principle as unconstitutional and solemnly pledged itself to the overthrow and destruction of the McKinley law and to the adoption of free trade as the policy of the United States.

   He spoke of the Wilson bill which was characterized by a Democratic president as "the child of perfidy and dishonor." It was so bad that the president would not contaminate his hand by signing it. A bill, said the speaker, that was too base for Mr. Cleveland to approve is too rotten for the approval of the American people.

   He referred to the effect of free coinage of silver and declared that it would ruin American credits, though at the same time he said the Republican party had always favored as large a use as possible of silver. "You cannot" said Mr. Fairbanks, "build the prosperity upon a base of fluctuating currency. As well undertake to build upon the changing sands of the sea. A sound currency defrauds no one. It is good alike in the hands of the employee and employer; the laborer and the capitalist. Upon faith in its worth, its stability, we go forward planning for the future. The capitalist erects his factories, acquires his materials, employs his artisans, mechanics and laborers. He is confident that his margin will not be swept away by fluctuations in currency."

   After declaring that the Monroe Doctrine must be upheld and that the Republicans sympathized with Cuba in its struggle for liberty, Mr. Fairbanks closed as follows: "My friends, the campaign of 1896 is upon us. The great questions for debate in the august forum of the United States are free trade and free silver against a protective tariff and sound money. As we regard our homes and our honor, our happiness and prosperity and the future power and majesty of the Republican party let us dedicate ourselves to the restoration of a protective tariff which shall be genuinely American and to the maintenance of an honest standard of value with which to measure the exchange of the people. A distinguished Republican has said that the supreme desire of the American people is for an "honest currency and a chance to earn it by honest toil."

SILVER MEN ANGRY.

"WILL FOLD THEIR TENTS LIKE ARABS AND STEAL AWAY."

Candidates for Vice President—Col. Fred Grant in the Race—Rumor That Morton May Reconsider

—Reed Would Surely Decline It.

   ST. LOUIS, June 16.—The anti-convention talk largely centered upon the probable action of the silver men if the gold plank was adopted. Notwithstanding Senator Teller's cautious statement that there would be no organized dramatic bolt, those who have been in consultation with him indicate plainly an intention of withdrawing from the convention hall before the proceedings terminate and even Senator Teller admits that the silver men may find it necessary for their self respect to refrain from participation in the proceedings.

   Senator Cannon of Utah puts it more bluntly. "How can we remain," he says, "and assist in the nomination of a ticket which we intend to oppose? Of course we must go out." The exodus may not be made by the silver men in a body, but it seems to be the settled program that they will "fold up their tents like the Arabs and steal away."

   A very persistent rumor was started early this morning and was heard simultaneously in three or four different quarters that Mr. Morton [New York] had reconsidered his declination and would accept the vice presidency if tendered him. For what purpose this rumor was put in circulation it is difficult to say, but that it had a purpose is apparent. Mr. Platt declined to discuss the matter in any shape. "We are here," he said, "to nominate Mr. Morton for the presidency, and until that matter is disposed of, we do not consider the vice presidency."

   U. S. Grant, who is here as a member of the California delegation, makes the announcement that his brother, Col. Fred Grant of New York, will be a candidate for the second place on the ticket. Speaking of the mention of his own name in connection with that office he said, "No, I am not a candidate. My brother, Col. Fred Grant, is my candidate for the vice presidency."

   "He has been quoted as saying that you are a candidate."

   "Yes, I know, but he will be a candidate, and he is my candidate. You know this vice-presidential question is never properly brought up until the president has been named. The second place is a sort of consolation cup. My brother Fred will be a candidate, and I think he should be nominated. His candidacy will not be pushed till the time comes. I am proud of the fact that he is my brother. I think the soldiers who were under my father and their sons will support him, but his own record deserves it. I do not ask it for him on father's record."

   Speaker Reed's Maine friends do not attach any special significance to the petition which was sent him from Boston asking his acceptance of the second place on the ticket. Mr. Reed is very popular in Massachusetts. The politicians from that state say he is their natural choice for the presidency, but that failing to secure this honor, they would like at least that he should accept the vice-presidency feeling that it would greatly strengthen the ticket.

EDITOR'S SADDLE.

[Paid Advertisement.]

   We are mad clean through, reason enough, to think that we can't go away for a day's spin through the country without coming home and finding the news editor has been sticking his rusty shears into the New York Herald, May 29, and extracting that old chestnut, headed, "Huge Profit in Building Bicycles," which was so thoroughly ventilated in the New York Daily's and the Cycling Press week before last.

   It is bad enough to have The Herald print such nonsense, without every paper in the country copying it. We have a friend here engaged in the bicycle business who would like to engage at once the services of the man who will build his high grade bicycles for $30.31, and pay him a big salary too.

   Anybody with any experience in bicycle construction would know at a glance that The Herald's figures apply to such wheels as are assembled and put on the market without guarantee or pedigree. We have seen a good many sold in a town not 100 miles away from here. The wheel described in The Herald has no more kinship with the high grade $100 wheel than an ordinary cow has with a thoroughbred trotter. Both animals are quadrupeds and there the semblance ceases.

   Figures like those given in The Herald might be applied to any business with equally surprising results. We would find road wagons could be bought as low as $20, and also as high as $500. No sane man would say one was as good as the other.

   We might figure the cost of editing a newspaper by itemizing the paper and ink at so much per pound, then adding the labor of typesetting and tending the presses, subtracting this amount from prices charged for advertising and sale of the paper, we would know just how much profit is being made in running the paper. In both cases invested capital, brain work in the office, cost of placing with the consumers, bad debts, and the thousand and one incidental expenses which come in and cut away the profits, have been neglected.

   Unlike newspapers bicycles have to be followed up for a year with a guarantee, and reputable manufacturers make their guarantees good. Guarantees cost money and have to be charged for. The guarantee is the unknown quantity of the equation in calculating cost of bicycles, and prevents the manufacturer from knowing what profit he has made on a wheel till a year after it has been sold.

   When we read articles like that in The Herald we feel like exclaiming with the poet, "Fools rush in where angels fear to tread."—Hub Sprocket.

   LOYAL WHEELS are daily increasing in popularity, because they are well built and backed by a reliable guarantee.

   We test them on the Main-st. pavement, and know they will stand riding over any road in the country.

   THE WESSOX-NIVISON MFG.CO.

   Owego and Squires-st., Cortland, N. Y.

BREVITIES.

   —The D., L. & W. pay car passed through Cortland at 10 o'clock this morning.

   —The Messenger House is receiving a fresh coat of red paint on the exterior. It freshens up the appearance of the brickwork wonderfully.

   —The Y. P. S. C. E. of the Congregational church will hold an ice cream and strawberry social at the residence of Mr. H. I. Jenkins, 50 Madison-st., Wednesday evening, June 17.

   —The Geneva Times celebrated its first birthday anniversary by enlarging from four pages to eight. The Times is an enterprising sheet, full of local news and matter interesting to its readers.

   —New advertisements to-day are—J. A. Jayne, war in prices, page 6; Bingham Bros. & Miller, largest store, largest stock, etc., page 7; New York Sunday Advertiser, a bargain, page 6.

   —The gold and silver medals as first and second prizes in the Y. M. D. C. oratorical contest at the Normal [school] Friday night are on exhibition in the window of the store of Jewett, the jeweler.

   —In case a shower at the last minute to-night should interfere with the bicycle parade, it will occur to-morrow night at the same time, or the first evening upon which weather and roads will be favorable.

   —The Cortland City band will get out on Church-st. to-night and will play for the bicyclists upon their return from the ride. The band has volunteered to do this free of expense to every one and is entitled to the thanks of all.

   —To-night the bicycle parade will occur at 7 o'clock, weather permitting. The shower at 2 o'clock this afternoon helped settle the dust and put the streets in good condition, and it is to be hoped that no more will come until after the parade. Let everyone be on hand on Church-st., by 6:45 o'clock, so that the procession can get off promptly at 7 o'clock.

Ice Cream To-night.

   Ten cents will purchase a large dish of ice cream at the Y. M. C. A. rooms tonight immediately after the bicycle parade.